Have you ever kissed a guy?
by mowmow
Summary: [Oneshot, slash, all dialogue. SBRL.] Sirius has questions, but he is also the one who has something to tell.


**Have you ever kissed a guy? **

_by Mô-chan _

**Disclaimer: **Do I look like J. K. Rowling? …thought not. And if I were her, the HP series wouldn't be stories for kids. Btw, who in their perfect mind would allow Sirius to DIE and be apart from Remus?

**Warning: **This contains slash, but it's just a bit though. Don't like, don't read.

**A/N: **So, this is my first fic in English (this is so NOT my first language, no matter how much I wanted it to be). I wrote this in less than one hour, which is more than scary, but I hope it's worth it. Mweheh.

-

"Moony... I need to talk to you!"

"You're already doing that."

"…yes, but… but could you at least LOOK at me while we talk?"

"No."

"Why not!"

"Because I'm reading, Sirius. And you know that I don't like it when you interrupt me just to tell me about the seventh girl that you've shagged this week."

"But I was not gonna tell you anything like that. And I thought that you _would _talk to me."

"_Fine_."

"You're angry."

"Just get straight to the point, Sirius!"

"Is there anything about me?"

"What!"

"Whatever thing that made you so… annoyed, all of a sudden."

"…"

"Yes, breath. Maybe it'll calm you down."

"Shut up! And don't… Don't grin at me like that. It won't work."

"Oh, but you're smiling."

"And you're hopeless!"

"…"

"Thanks. Now, what was it that you needed to talk to me about?"

"Actually, I wanted to ask you something."

"So...?"

"Promise me you won't go nuts?"

"…just spit it already, Padfoot."

"Oh-oh, you sound angry again."

"I promise that I'll not go nuts, but I'll get really MAD at you if you don't fucking tell me what this rubbish is about!"

"Ouch. My Remy doesn't say bad words."

"And my Siri is not a prick."

"Sometimes… I get this feeling that you're like a woman…"

"WHAT?"

"Yeah, you just freak out because of nothing at all, like Lily does when she's… she's… well… you know… those days…"

"…"

"Sorry."

"…"

"Awww Moony, I'm really sorry, ok? I know you're not a woman. I'm serious."

"Of course you're Sirius."

"Oh no, not that pun again!"

"…"

"Moony… You're _grinning_."

"So what?"

"Er… well… nothing. Can I sit next to you?"

"You never ask me that and you even lay your head over my lap anyway."

"Can I take that as a 'yes'?"

"Shut up and sit here. And let me finish my book."

"But… Moooooonyyy… I haven't asked you _that _question."

"And what was that 'Can I sit next to you'-question?"

"It has nothing to do with the important one."

"Just… just ask it, Sirius. I don't understand why you seem to be so nervous."

"I'm not nervous."

"Yes, you're. You wouldn't ask for permissions, you wouldn't hesitate to lean against me as you're doing right now, and you wouldn't be so worried about not annoying me if you weren't n.e.r.v.o.u.s."

"You know me too well."

"Spit it. NOW."

"Have you ever kissed a guy?"

"…"

"…"

"WHAT!"

"You heard me."

"…You can't be serious…"

"Of course I am, you've just said that, remember?"

"Don't try that one with me Black, you know it won't work."

"You're blushing."

"…"

"Awww, your face is crimson now!"

"Aren't you afraid of death, Padfoot?"

"Not when you call me that. You would have called me by my whole name if you were really, reeeeaaaally angry."

"Now, where did that question come from?"

"What? About kissing a guy?"

"…"

"Oh. Well… It came up from nowhere."

"_Sirius_."

"Pun again? Oh… Ok, ok, I'll stop, as long as you don't get angry. Naah. Why don't you just answer it?"

"…why do you want to… to know something like that?"

"I'll take you to Madam Pomfrey if you blush once more, you know? I'll start thinking that you're sick or something."

"_Why_."

"Oh-oh, murderous voice again. I… I'm just curious, that's all."

"And here I thought you had a good reason… Oh, honestly, Sirius Orion Black! If you're just trying to trick me, than get the hell out of here and leave me alone."

"You know, I think I'll call you Moody instead of Moony."

"…"

"Oh no, give that damned book here and talk to me!"

"…"

"Please, Moony… Please, just answer…"

"Not until you tell me why."

"Ok, ok. I wanted to ask you because I… well… _I'veneverdonethat_."

"Come again!"

"I've… I've never… done that."

"Now now, look at who's blushing this time."

"Don't laugh at me, Remus. Please. Just answer it."

"Ok. Me neither. Happy now?"

"No."

"…what else do you want, Padfoot?"

"You were too fast for someone who has never done that."

"I wouldn't be so fast if I_had_. We're supposed to like girls, remember?"

"Yeah, but… but…"

"But what? …Oh my God. You… you…"

"I what! No, Moony, don't look at me like that!"

"You HAVE kissed a guy!"

"No!"

"Of course you have! Give me any other reason for you to ask me something like that, then!"

"Because I like one."

"You like one what?"

"A guy."

"…"

"…"

"…"

"Breath, Moony."

"…Padfoot…"

"Yeah. It's true."

"…"

"But I haven't kissed him. Yet."

"…yet?"

"Well, when you like someone, you hope that at least someday, somehow, you'll be able to kiss them once… isn't it?"

"I… I guess so."

"…"

"…"

"You... Moony… your eyes are… why…? Did I say or-"

"Leave me alone, Sirius."

"Why are you sad? Don't hide your face, Moony… Look at me!"

"…"

"Dear Merlin, you're crying…!"

"I'm not."

"Are too."

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"AM NOT, DAMNIT!"

"…sorry. But… Moony…! Why are you sad!"

"Don't ask me that."

"But… Moony, we're friends… I wanna help you… Ok?"

"You can't."

"Of course I can! There isn't anything impossible for Sirius Black, remember?"

"…"

"Well, at least you managed to smile a bit. Now, why do I get the feeling that you're as straight as I am?"

"What do you mean…?"

"You understood."

"So let's pretend that I didn't."

"I like blokes. You too."

"You like me too?"

"Yes! No! I mean… MOONY!"

"…"

"Stop laughing! And what I intended to say is that you like blokes too."

"How would you know that?"

"You didn't freak out when I told you that I was gay."

"And I had to if I wanted to prove that I'm straight?"

"Well, James did."

"It doesn't prove anything. And you know that I'm a werewolf, so I'm the last person in the world that would judge your… well… _you_."

"You mean my sexual orientation?"

"…yeah."

"You poor excuse for a Marauder."

"Why!"

"Marauders shouldn't be shy about something as common, necessary and wonderful as sex."

"Shut up, Sirius."

"Well, at least now you're not angry or sad anymore. I mean, not r_eally _. …Moony?"

"…"

"I… Do you want to know who?"

"Who what?"

"Who I like."

"…you… you don't have to tell me that."

"But I want to. I need you… I mean… I need to tell you… and… _You_ need to know."

"Why me?"

"Because it's you."

"That's not enough."

"No, I mean… It's _you_."

"I think we're not getting to the same point, Sirius."

"Of course we are. Just let me clarify something here: I like YOU. You, you, and only you."

"I like you too. We're friends."

"Don't _you _try that one with me, Moony. I like you as more than a friend. Much more. You're the guy that made me realize that I didn't want any girl anymore, no matter how pretty or hot or intelligent or whatever rubbish she was."

"You're…"

"…I what?"

"…you're kidding me."

"No, and you know I'm not, because you wouldn't be paling instead."

"…"

"You're stunned because it's true."

"…"

"I love you, Moony. And I want you to be the first guy to be kissed by Sirius Orion Black."

"…"

"Yeah, laugh because I'm not good at words, but this is not a prank, ok? I'm not fucking kidding, I'm not fucking lying, I'm just fucking yo-"

"DON'T YOU DARE finish that, Black!"

"Oh, ok."

"…too much information."

"Can I kiss you?"

"WHAT!"

"We were doing so fine, Moony. Let's not go back to the start, please."

"Idiot."

"Ouch, you really hurt my feelings when you call me that."

"Sarcasm."

"Of course. Just not as much as you've used. Now, can I?"

"What?"

"Kiss you."

"No!"

"Why not?"

"Because you don't deserve it."

"…"

"…"

"…"

"…why are you smiling? Sirius… You're… you're scaring me…"

"I wouldn't push it if you had said that you didn't like me."

"But I don't like you."

"Liar."

"Sirius… don't… one more step and I'll scream!"

"No, you won't… you'll be too occupied to do that…"

"You wouldn't dare-"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"Moony…"

"…Sirius…"

"…yeah?"

"Do that again."

"…"

"…"

"…"

"I love you too."

"I knew it."

"Idiot."

"But you love me."

"…"

-

_End._

**A/N: **Review? Please…?


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